Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Thoughts of the future

Have you ever wondered how would you be like, say, 20 or 30 years from now? Apart from, of course, trying to achieve (if not yet) your goal in life.

Recently, my mind is going hizzy-dizzy about the incontestable fact that time flies sooooooooo fast, and that I'm not getting any younger. And so do you, I bet!

Whenever we talk of the future, we always talk about dreams or goals in life. Let's do away with that for a moment. Modesty aside, I have so far achieved whatever I wanted to have in life. Despite life's hardships and limited opportunities to gain material wealth, I somehow managed to feel satisfied with that I have right now. Of course, I could have wanted more, why not? But the good side of me tells me that what I have right now is just enough. Hence, my description of being "satisfied at life's abundances." While the term abundance is somewhat relative, I have always believed that whatever comes along the way, it is part of that so-called abundance in life.

Did I just say let's not talk about these things, at least for now? Anyway, so much so for those wallows of abstractions. Let's face reality, and go back to what I am trying to say here.

I am in my early 30s now and my son is still very young. By the time he gets into college, hubby and I are almost retirables. Should he pursue a medical career (which I have proudly envisioned for him to be), that would mean many more years before he could be officially called a doctor and start his bustling career. And what if he doesn't marry right away? If ever he does, by the time we'll have our first grandchild, we would be old (and hopefully not sickly) enough to take care of his little fellow. And who knows, I may not be able to make it that far. This is not being pessimistic and all that, but let's face it that it is a possibility.

This is, of course, fast-forwarding time. And as my mind goes back to the present time, I then ask myself, "What am I thinking? My son is not even able to confidently
walk by himself." I laughed at myself after a while. What an insane thought!

After this, I resolved not to think of those things anymore but try to fully enjoy the present time. Yeah, I guess that's the right attitude. My son won't be a baby forever, so I (must) treasure every moment with him while he is still as cute, lovable and huggable tiny fellow as he is now. ;) And worry not about the future, for the future can take care of itself.

Whew! Here goes another episode of my, ahh... thinking beyond? :D


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